Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Today, I Don't Give a Shit

In reply to comments in the Q&A post:
Just: Aww.. I am glad someone missed me and realised my disappearance! :P And I like that term 'fuck nuts' - dammit, I'm so using it now!

savante: Hmm.. maybe i will.. one day. :P

Brett and Kayess: Go die.

Ron: Shuttup - nothing wrong with Grey's... the first few seasons anyway. :)

***

I think I just won a trip to either LA or Johannesburg. I'll find out on Monday! And I might put a poll to see if I should go to LA or Johannesburg!

***

I just got home from a networking event. I had three invites in my mailbox to three completely different events tonight at the same time and I hate that I had to choose one.

I am sitting here staring at my screen with a message on Yahoo IM and an email in my inbox that really deserve a reply. But I lie here staring at the screen, feeling rather... cut.

And for the first time in a very, very, very long time, I don't give a shit... about anything. I... kind of... I guess, give up.

This week, it feels like the whole world is against me, and physically, quite literally, I feel like... I feel like I am suffocating. I quite literally feel that my head has gone into haywire. I have permanent ridges on my forehead and my heart actually aches.

I kept fighting back this whole week, but today, I just gave up. In a conversation today, I didn't even bother justifying myself, I just left the conversation altogether without a reply. Here I am again, staring at this IM message and email from two completely seperate individual, and I... don't know what to say.

Oh world, why are you so cruel sometimes.

7 comments:

torchy! said...

Aaron. i'm so sorry you feel this bad. you've been under a hell of a lot of stress lately. no way am i saying that you're not going thru shit, but the stress is probably making it even more difficult to deal with.

free trip? w00t! lucky you :D

leaving the conversion? hi-5's! some ppl just deserve that more than justification. good for you.

the whole world against you? i sincerely hope not. i wanna be the only one against you :P

*hugs*
torchy!

Just said...

hey fuck nuts ... it's ok for today I will give a shit for us both.... you know ... I love and care... hang in there... Damn dude you had a lot of shit you had to do lately ... it's ok not to give a shit today .... now tomorrow ... lol .. no just teasing ... do hope you get some rest man. Love Just

Octavius said...

I'm not against you, well not in that way anyway "big fella" so that makes torchy, just and myself. There is three that are with you so far, so all things considered that's a start.

Don't worry about felling down, we all go there sometimes, and I do the same thing with convos occasionally.

Cheer up sad sack!

Octavius.

Ron said...

oh Aaron :( i'm so sorry to hear that you're upset. I'm sure it'll be a temporary thing and will lift soon? Just think positive, I guess.

oh gosh if only i'd listen to half of the advice i give people. i need to work on my own positivity myself. like, big time.

and oooh! free trip, i'd go to LA :D

lov Ron <3

B. Kushner said...

LA and Johannesburg are both exciting to visit I'm sure! Congrats!

Try simply vegging around sometimes if you get the chance. Having days where you do nothing at all can be quite a relief. :)

Brett said...

Love you too Aaron =P.

I hope you feel better soon mate. Don't stress too much =]

Hugs,
Brett.

Kayess said...

with regards on which city to choose...
look at the one you're least comfortable with and then choose it ;D

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